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May 2, 2012

My Soul...


Let me share something to you, it makes absolutely no sense at all,
you are far from everything, and close to nothing…

This is everything I have longed for, yet I still want more...
So listen, as all my dark secrets are being exposed to broad daylight...

Just when everything starts to feel right, nothing feels wrong…
My heart starts burning a deep empty hole that spills out my soul...

I secretly see myself as invisible, when in reality…
I’m just screaming to be heard and known…

All the while you, me and the rest of the world are in denial…
And that is when I ask myself, why this soul ever reached for survival…

Beautiful Huh?
Written by: Karen Drake

April 26, 2012

Another Year

by Brenda Penepent

Another year has come, And you're, so far away from me now; But in my heart still. Forever, I will hold you close. Each smile, laugh and tear I’ve cried A testament to your presence. I will always love you, No matter what happens. Your death can not separate us. I’m right here, loving you as always. My heart is true and strong. I will never forget your spirit. I am no longer afraid. To live or die is the same for me. You are with me on this journey. I raise your light to the heavens, and smile.


April 23, 2012

A Letter to and from My Baby...

His 104th Week in Heaven...
.
Good morning Greggy,

I wanted to write and say

104 Weeks now since you've been away,

Mom's been thrown into a whirl

Trying to survive each day

With a heart dead to this world...

 
And yet I live in peace

Knowing where you are...

God meets me in my grief

And despite you've gone afar,

I sense you here beside me

Pure in spirit and sweet ~

It's God's gift to me,

A dear and special treat.


His time-zone is instant

In spirit-world, tis true,

So though you're very distant,

You reach me when I'm blue:

When I feel my heart crushing

Till I can bear no more,

That's when He sends you rushing

To remind me what's in store...

 
"Mom, I'm so happy

Your prayers for me came true~

So now I'm truly laughing

Amazed at what God can do!

Remember all you told me:

When you're sad, keep looking up!


"If on earth your cup is empty,

In Heaven, He'll fill your cup!

Take your eyes off your burden

Give it, instead, to Him;

When death pulls the curtain

Your life starts over with Him!

And with any tears you shed there,

He'll water your gardens Here;

And for any burdens you bear there,

He'll draw you even closer Here!"


Thank You Lord for my child's sweet communion,

Thank You his name is written on Your hands,

Thank You his name is seared onto Your heart,

All the love for him, my own heart commands

Could never for him, true Life impart.

Thank You for suffering Your own Child's death,

That He willingly gave up His own life's breath

That we'll have Life with You, and Love's sweet reunion!

April 18, 2012

Desi & Joey

Desi & Joey

April 18  -  Joe and I. Sorry its soooo dark. There wasn't much light outside
Christina Back Whale Both of you are smiling & that's ALWAYS Wonderful to wake up to... :-)

After I lightened it up a little...

Don't they look happy!?

They had gone to the The Marshall Tucker Band!
At the SR Perrott 50th anneversary party!



April 2, 2012

The Day My Husband Quit Our Marriage...

Less than 2 years after our youngest son died at the young age of
18 years, 7 months, & 24 days old;
My husband of 23 years has decided he no longer wants to be married to me.
How can I Rest?


February 14, 2012

"How long will the pain last?"

"How long will the pain last?"
A broken-hearted mourner asked me.


"All the rest of your life."
I had to answer truthfully.
We never quite forget.
No matter how many years pass,
we remember. The loss of a loved one
is like a major operation; part of us is
removed, and we have a scar for the
rest of our lives. This does not mean that
the pain continues at the same intensity.
There is a short while, at first, when we
hardly believe it; it is rather like when we cut
our hand. We see the blood flowing, but the pain has
not set in yet. So when we are bereaved, there is a short
while before the pain hits us. But when it does,
it is massive in its effect. Grief is shattering.
Then the wound begins to heal.
It is like going through a dark tunnel.
Occasionally we glimpse a bit of light up
ahead, then we lose sight of it awhile, and
then see it again, and one day we merge into
the light. We are able to laugh, to care, to live.
The wound is healed so to speak.
The stitches are taken out, and we are whole again.
But not quite. The scar is still
there, and the scar tissue, too.
As the years go by, we manage.
There are things to do, people to care
for, and tasks that call for full attention.
But the pain is still there, not far below the
surface. We see a face that looks familiar,
hear a voice that has echoes, see a photograph
in someone's album, see a landscape that once
we saw together, and it as though
the knife were in the wound again.
But not so painfully, and mixed with joy, too.
Because remembering a happy time is not all sorrow;
it brings back happiness with it. As a matter of fact,
we even seek such moments in bittersweet remembrance.
We have our religious memories and our memorial days,
and our visits to the cemetery.
And though these bring back the pain,
they bring back memories of joy as well.
How long will the pains last? All the rest of
your life. But the thing to remember is that not
only the pain will last, but the blessed memories
as well. Tears are the proof of life. The more love,
the more tears. If this were true, then how could we ever
ask that the pain cease altogether?
For then the memory of love would go with it.
The pain of grief is the price we pay for love.

January 2, 2012

A comment...

I am so sorry you are going through so much... The pain of losing our child / children, is the worst... I'm only 43 & it'll be 2 years in April since we lost our youngest son (forever 18 yrs, 7 months, & 24 days old) because of a car accident... That day was the worst day of my life, but since his death, I have felt that pain over & over again, but yet I do sometimes have a good day, when the tears are very minimum... I don't know if it will ever get easier... The grief Feeling we go through when our children die, is like a lightning bolt to a huge Tree, total dispair... But it's during those times we have to think more about being Blessed with all the time we DID GET with our children... Yeah, I can talk about both positives & negatives, but it takes both to make the world turn... So When you're feeling down, look up! Broken </3 Hearts can heal....... well....... that's what I've been told.......

January 1, 2012

Happy New Year - 2012...


♥ To ALL My FAMILY; FRIENDS; & FELLOW GRIEVING PARENTS ♥

Live with NO regrets, Love with ALL your heart,
and GIVE with all your soul. Happy 2012!
♥ May God Bless each one of you and keep you safe. ♥

ONLY: 1 Year or 12 Months or 52.2 Weeks or 366 Days
8,784 Hours or 527,040 Minutes or 31,622,400 Seconds
Until January 1, 2013